Sunday, August 26, 2007

August 2007

This is what I originally envisioned when I got the idea for this blog some months ago. It's something I thought about suggesting to Skippy, he could create a post like this one, put a link to it on the sidebar and then he would have the equivalent of an archive. I'm happy to keep doing it here if he doesn't want to.

Oh, and I updated the Mission Statement.

8-1-2007

08-03-200708-04-200708-06-200708-07-200708-08-200708-09-200708-10-200708-13-200708-15-200708-16-200708-17-200708-18-200708-2-200708-21-200708-23-200708-24-200708-25-200708-26-200708-27-200708-28-200708-29-20078-30-2007

Saturday, August 25, 2007

La Lohan

New Update 4-15-2009!!: Skippy's new Lohan odes inspired me to do a search on Enjoy Every Sandwich, and I found 3 posts that I had mist from late 07. If you thought you had read every Lohan post several times, think again!

If you're one of the new readers brought in by the Kinsella affair not yet familiar with the Lohan story, it gets transcendently awesome with the On Role Models post, My favorite is NY Times is wrong. Read those ones first and then go back to the beginning for completeness, then bookmark this list, because, if you have any aesthetic sense at all, you'll want to re-read these at least a couple of times a year.

From oldest to most recent:


Thursday, January 05, 2006 All This, Bulimia and Drug Problems Too!
Wednesday, July 12, 2006 Lindsay Lohan Wants To Be a Filthy Little Whore, skippystalin Graciously Offers His Assistance
Thursday, September 14, 2006 On Role Models and the Importance Thereof
Monday, June 11, 2007 Lindsay Lohan is the Greatest American Ever
Thursday, July 19, 2007 Bikini Rehab Works Wonders! How Lindsay Lohan Can Save Your Life!
Wednesday, July 25, 2007 The New York Times is Wrong and Bernie Brillstein is a Big Meanie
Friday, July 27, 2007 Susan Estrich Won't Shut Up: A Profile In Inhumanity
Thursday, August 02, 2007 Lindsay Lohan Loves Everybody
Friday, August 24, 2007 Lindsay Lohan Fights The Law, Wins!
Thursday, November 15, 2007OH, THE HARD-NIPPLED HUMANITY: LINDSAY LOHAN FACES JUSTICE
Sunday, December 23, 2007Lindsay Lohan Has the Right Idea Breathtaking Jugs
Tuesday, February 19, 2008 Perfect Day
Monday, March 24, 2008 Lindsay Lohan and the Painful Power of Truth
Wednesday, April 8, 2009Making My Heart Grow Fonder
Tuesday, April 14, 2009I Might Be The One For You!


If anyone knows of any ones I've missed, please drop a comment.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Jackpot!

Skippy found this dump of links in his referrers and obliged us all with a link to the Japanese love doll post that inspired me to set this up in the first place.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Ask Skippy

I would love to see this feature revived. I would ask Skippy's advice about something, but most advice columnists answer questions from people who have problems relating to other people. To have those problems, I would have to get out and meet some non-imaginary people. That project is one I keep putting off.

Skippy's Intro
ASK skippy, VOLUME ONE
ASK skippy, VOLUME TWO
ASK skippy, VOLUME THREE
ASK skippy, VOLUME FOUR
ASK skippy, VOLUME FIVE
ASK skippy, PART FIVE
ASK skippy, PART SIX
ASK skippy, PART SEVEN
ASK skippy, PART EIGHT
ASK skippy: PART NINE
ASK skippy: PART TEN
ASK skippy, PART ELEVEN
ASK skippy, PART TWELVE
ASK skippy: PART THIRTEEN
ASK skippy: PART FOURTEEN
ASK skippy: PART FIFTEEN
ASK skippy: PART SIXTEEN
ASK skippy, PART SEVENTEEN

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Canadian Politics

Skippy often analyzes Canadian politics in ways that may be interesting to his more literate readers. Those readers will have to make their own Skippy link dump.

Saturday, January 17, 2004
GEORGE W. BUSH, A MAN AMOUNG MEN

Wednesday, November 16, 2005 2:02 PM
This summary of Quebec politics from November of 05 is a good place to start for those of us who only read about Canadian politics when there's dick jokes involved. Money quote: Unlike in the rest of Canada, leadership races in Quebec are downright fascinating. In English Canada, your likelihood of becoming the leader of a major political party is directly proportionate to your ability not to clash too much with the furniature. In Quebec generally - and the Parti Quebecois specifically - you can be a guy who lives under a bridge and talk about nothing but the war that God and the Devil that is fought entirely in your own skull and be assured a spot on the second ballot.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

The anti-catholic archive

Skippy has a boner for the Catholic church that exceeds anything I've seen elsewhere. His hatred of the one true church animates his prose like nothing else. In his own words:

"If any of my readers ever want to hear an incandescent flurry of rhetorical violence, ask a lapsed Catholic his or her views on the Church. Then break out the popcorn and step back, becuse it's showtime! Oh, and don't worry. The screaming should stop in four or five hours. Goading an anti-papist is like giving booze to a recovering alcoholic ... wrong, but too much fun not to do."
I've done this myself and I can vouch for how much fun it is. Bookmark this list when you don't have a lapsed catholic handy and save the fun for a rainy day.

Sunday, August 24, 2003 6:42 PM
HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN

Friday, August 29, 2003 3:28 PM
FURTHER PROOF THAT GOD ISN'T CATHOLIC

Thursday, November 06, 2003 1:33 PM
VATICAN SEX TIPS

Wednesday, November 12, 2003
"YOU NEVER HEAR ABOUT THE KIDS WE DIDN'T MOLEST...."

Tuesday, December 16, 2003 8:08 AM
CONSISTENTLY WRONG SINCE 1146

Friday, January 16, 2004
MEMO TO MICHAEL II

Friday, February 06, 2004 9:56 PM
YOUR CATHOLIC CHURCH AT WORK

Monday, February 23, 2004 6:23 PM
OBSCENITY

Sunday, February 29, 2004 6:21 PM
MORE ANTI-PAPIST FUN

Wednesday, March 17, 2004
OTHER SIGNS SOCIETY IS DOOMED If you're wondering about the urinals mentioned at the beginning of this post, the story is here.

Tuesday, March 30, 2004 9:29 AM
IN WHICH I DEFEND JOHN KERRY AS A MEANS OF FURTHER ATTACKING THE CATHLOLIC CHURCH

Saturday, April 10, 2004 9:31 AM
Happy Easter From The Philippines

Saturday, September 04, 2004 2:40 PM
The Pope Should Suck my Balls money quote: "Today, the new ambassador of Canada presented his credentials to the Pope. "His Holiness" took this opportunity to denounce the recognition of same-sex marriage in the provinces of Quebec, Ontario and British Columbia. Were I an officer of the Canadian government, I would tactifully point out that Canada is less than appreciative of their people fucking our children. But we didn't. This is because Canadians are cowards. "

Monday, January 24, 2005 8:52 AM
THEOLOGY OF DEATH

Sunday, April 03, 2005 12:46 PM
"KAROL WOJTYLA : 1920-2005"

Saturday, April 23, 2005 10:22 AM
HABEMUS PAPAM : A TALE OF MISSED OPPORTUNITIES

Wednesday, April 06, 2005 8:25 PM
ON POPES, PRESIDENTS & POLITENESS

Wednesday, July 06, 2005 6:44 PM
Anti-papist wednesday

Wednesday, January 25, 2006 10:58 PM
PAPAL NEWSFLASH: GOD GOOD, SEX BAD, MARXISM EVEN WORSE. STRANGE SCENES FROM "FUCK A COMMIE FOR CHRIST" DAY

Sunday, March 05, 2006 8:47 AM
WON'T YOU TAKE ME TO CATHOLIC TOWN?

Sunday, October 08, 2006 7:47 AM
Bill Donohue and the Interesting Logic of the Catholic League

Tuesday, October 16, 2007 7:51 AM
The Wide Stance Returneth Home

A true classic

This post has no link on the front page and doesn't come up first when you google "Long dong" proving that there's no justice in the world:

Long dong of the law

The sidebar

This is the current contents of the sidebar:

Retard Cage Match of the Doomed: The Sad Saga of the 2005/06 Canadian Federal Election - November 26, 2005 - January 24, 2006
Tyson TV: All Mike, All the Time
The Ballad of Captain Geography
The Madness of Mayor Mel
I Told Her I Love Her and She Said "Que?"
The skippystalin Lecture Series, Part One: Lessons of a Shithead Cyrano
The skippystalin Lecture Series, Part Two: The Cunnilingus Chronichles
Uday, We Hardly Knew Ye
California Tumbles Into the Sea
Terminating Government
Arnold Uber Alles
Waiting for Gaiman
In the Realm of the Gaiman Fan
"They're Selling Postcards Of The Hanging / They're Painting The Passports Brown" - Notes From The Ritual Suicide Of The Progressive Conservative Movement In Ontario
My Dinner With Dr. Reverend
skippy's Protection For Pornography Week Proclomation
skippy For President
Some Girls Give Me Knighthoods I Never Asked Them For
Richard Nixon Died For Your (Explative Deleted) Sins
Mr. & Mrs. Bloody Diapers, Bob Dylan & The Unbearable Gayness Of skippy
Give Me A Leonard Cohen Afterworld : Thoughts On Kurt Cobain, Ten Years Gone
George W. Bush And Me
The Passion Of Carl Bernstein
Adventures In Loss Prevention: Mind Your Own Mongloid
"Welcome To Canada. Now Show Us Your Tits!"
These Things I Believe: Gay Marriage And The Future Of American Law
Retail Politics, Wholesale Horseshit
George W. Bush: Last Of The Big Government Liberals
Getting Serious About Islamist Terrorism
Death Smells Sweetest In The Fall: A Timely Obituary For The Candidacy Of John Forbes Kerry, Esquire
The Dumbest Songs Ever: "Do They Know It's Christmas"
A Love Letter to Michelle, Driver of the 9:10PM Rocket Bus From Scarborough Town Center to Don Mills Station
How To Get Ahead In Terorism Without Even Trying
Breaking With History: Bush's Second Inaugaral Address
Some Kind Of Monster
"The Doctor Will See You Now:" Kevin White Has The Greatest Bedside Manner Ever!
The House That Hunter Built
A Quiet, Peaceful Life: A Portrait in 24 Hours
In Praise of Paris Hilton
Just You and Me, Punk Rock Girl
Who's Afraid Of W. Axl Rose?
The Girls of Porn:


Part One: Nikita Denise, Getting Fucked By Porn Stars: Not Always As Much Fun As You'd Think
, Part Two: Silvia Saint, Jenna Jameson Is Braver Than You Are, Part Three: Inari Vachs, Obituary Edition:Anna Malle, Special Report: Mimi Miyagi and the Parliament of Whores

Mass Transit Performance Art
The Adventures of Zanta
Terri Schiavo And Political Hypocracy
Come To Me, My Karly-Curls
skippy and Scalia: The Tale of a Great Friendship
How The Republican Party Found God And Lost Its Soul
Running On The Grave Of Terri Schiavo: Not Just For Republicans Anymore
Deep Throat, Watergate and the Legacy Of Richard Nixon
In Canada, You've Never Really "Done Your Time"
The Revenge of LBJ Updated November 27, 2005
On L. Cohen, Swindled and Bankrupt: A Cautionary Tale
Dinner is Served: Thoughts on Jessica Alba
Your Own Personal Jesus
Using Pakistani Domestic Policy To Flirt
In The Court Of The Maximum Leader
Sex Offender Registries And Stupidity
Most People Are Wrong: Why Angelina Jolie Is A Much Better Wife Than Jennifer Anniston
Death Of A Ladies Man: Martinis, Tranquilizers & Wife Beating - The Decline & Fall of Rene Levesque
New Jersey, Home of the Sexy
On the Smell of Victory...Among Oter Things
Free At Last, Free At Last, Good God Almighty, I Am Free At Last
Okay, But Hardly Lawsuit Worthy: The Litigious Tits Of Jennifer Anniston
Justice For Karly-Curls
Fuck the Children, Fuck those Needle-Dicked, Non-Smoking Cocksuckers, And if You Disagree With Me, Fuck You, Too!
The Greatest Story Ever Told,and Part Two
Speaking Words of Wisdom: Jessica Alba's Ass
Jessica Simpson Discusses Her Tits, Nick Lachey Unable to Stop Weeping
A Nuclear Iran: Let's Start Thinking Like Rational Adults, Shall We?
No Means No, You Bitch!
Confessions of a Tobacco Fiend
Behold the Magic Wand! Fear the Magic Wand!
Me Learn Good, Part 1 Part Two Part Three
Get Your Wings
Hymen Love With You
Scott Stapp Must Die
Wherein the Birthday Boy is Challenged
Won't You Take Me To Catholic Town
Fuck Texas
Love Letters From Rummy
Whereupon Terrorist Threats Are Made Upon Poetry Magazine
Evangeline Lilly Is A Delusional Pain In The Ass And Should Be Beheaded Soon
The Greatest Conspiracy Story Ever Told
She Come 'Round Here, Just About Midnight
Sean Connery Smacks His Bitch Up
"You Should See My Home. It's.....So Nice
Lifestyle Columnists Aren't Very Smart
Susan Sarandon Is a Liberal Loudmouth, Also Has Spectacular Knockers
skippystalin: International Criminal Extradionaire, The Further Adventures of Fast Johnny Fuckhead, I'll Make You Famous: The New Adventures of Crazy Johnny Arkle
Thoughts on I'm Not a Feminist, But...
Notes on the Great Retard Smoking Debate
Valerie Gibson And I Finally Agree: Children Are Evil And Have More Fun Than Either Of Us
"I Don't Know But I've Been Told / Recruiting's Gotten Awfully Bold"
He's Just Not That Into You
Why Elvis is Still the King
Gullible's TravelsWho's the Better Boyfriend? Part One: Zacarias Moussaoui, Part Two: Roy Cohn
Good To See That Worked Out: Thoughts On Middle East Democracy
The Neverending Story Of Pamela Anderson & Tommy Lee
The World Isn't Fair: On Hot, Blonde Supermodels and the Trolls Who Eat Them Out in Public , Victoria Silvstedt, The Lord, and the Mysterious Ways Thereof
Requiem for a Heavyweight: On the Late, Great Rob Smith
From the Department of Sexy Secrets Revealed: Regis Philbin Edition
Is Bill Clinton a Fairy or Just an Asshole?
Building A Better Broad
Oh, Grow the Fuck Up, You Fucking Babies
Big Ones, Little Ones ... Everyone Loves Boobies
Titanic Titties Top Terror
From The Department of Behaviour Modification
Dildos Can Be Dangerous
"And I Know No One Can Sing The Blues Like Blind Willie McTell"
When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong
G.G. Allin And The Meaning Of Life
Is Karl Rove Finished?
Leave My Porno Slut Alone, Destroying The Villiage To Save It
Lindsay Lohan And The Importance Of Role Models
Let's Get Kinky!
Dear Mr. President, Go Fuck Yourself
He's Not That Innocent: The Devil & Mikhail Sergeyevich
Full Of Cum, Full Of Dumb: The Ballad of Belinda Stronach
Let's Hear It For The Boy: Mark Foley & The Meaning Of Love
Bill Donohue And The Interesting Logic Of The Catholic League
The Greatest American Hero: Mouhammed Shaukat, Soldier Of Freedom
Remember Her Voice: A Plea To Support The Memory Of Iris Chang, 1968-2004
Robert Redford & The Infamous Mr. Ed
Screeched: Dustin Diamond Is Ready For His Close-Up
In My Father's House
Postcards Of The Hanging: The Softer Side Of Saddam
New Model # 15: The Unquiet Love Life of Marilyn Manson
Kim Kardashian And The Color Of Love
Gavin Newsom Is On Fucking Fire!
Assissted Suicide For The Mentally Ill: Not As Crazy As You'd Think
The Sad Life And Death Of A Centerfold
Getting Obama
Lisa Marie Nowak Wants To Know What Love Is
Stem Cells: Now With New And Improved Tits!
Locking Up The Toybox: The Sad, Strange Saga of Williams v. Attorney General of Alabama
"Hurt Him? It Damn Near Rectum!:" An Asshole Adventure In A Loser's Life
"With A Head Full Of Snow:" Keith Richards & The Meaning Of Father's Day
Any Way You Cut It, I'm Fucked: Sikhism & skippy
The Devil, Daniel Johnston, Dr. Reverend & Me
The People vs. Paris Hilton
Lindsay Lohan is the Greatest American Ever!
Making a Run for the Border: Why Comprehensive Immigration Reform is Unmitigated Bullshit
On Richard Russell, Curiously Remembered
The Decline & Fall of Katie Couric
If I Was Peter North
The Greatest Song Ever
Getting Sober The Right Way
Constitutional Law in Theory and Practice Through the Eyes of an Idiot
Chuck Schumer is a Dick!
Give Me Your Poor, Your Tired, Your Huddled Leftist Shitheads, Yearning to Annoy Me
The Poontang Primary

Mission Statement

The purpose of this site is to save links to all of Skippystalin's posts so that when they go off the main page I can still find them again. One example of the problem. A little while back he did a post on the Japanese love-doll story. That post is off the main page now and not in his sidebar and lost to the world until he decides to put it up there (update: Skippy took pity on us and sent that link). A while back, I started saving links to Skippy posts just to avoid this problem, but really the best place to save them is in another blog. That's what this blog is for. It will be the archive Skippy doesn't have.

This blog has no identity of its own. There is no link to anything but Skippy here, and nothing to indicate who is doing this. I would rather keep my public web presence separate from Skippy, as he himself does.

What you will find here will be mostly lists of my favorite Skippy posts organized around a theme like the worship of Lindsay Lohan or something and then collections for past months. I just started doing this, so August 07 is the only month we have so far. Maybe Skippy will like the idea and either co-opt it and do that himself, or maybe he'll dump a bunch of links in the comments, like all the links for July or something, then later dump all the links for another past month, and I can organize them into a list like the one linked to above. Or mabye, he'll just ignore us and continue doing what he does. Time will tell.

Update: 10/27/2007 As you can see in the comments, Skippy discovered this site pretty quickly and helped out with some links to fill up some of the theme lists. But just last weekend with a bunch of shit I had to do and really didn't want to, I found a way to crawl up skippy's back door and extract all the links to every one of his old posts, which I did. You can find the master list here.

I serve as Skippy's unofficial archivist at his pleasure. If he gives the word, this site vanishes. But I will be keeping the lists and copies of his posts on my own hard drive for my own um.. purposes.

Oh, and here's what Skippy said when he found this archive.